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This article is a transcript of the Greatest Freakout Ever episode "Greatest freak out ever 6 (FAKE 2)" from lost, which posted on July 31, 2009.

  • Jack: Okay, Stephen's in his room, because he got grounded for breaking the microwave. So, I'm gonna really mess with him. I'm gonna tie this rope to the banister, and then tie it to the door. You won't believe that. (Door Creaking. Jack puts the camera on Stephen's top drawer, and he gets out of Stephen's room and closes the door. 18 seconds later, Jack's knocking at the door, and he woke him up.) Wake up, Stephen. (Knocking Door)
  • Stephen: Oh, my god. Dude, you scared the crap out of me. Oh, my god. Unlock the door, Jack. Jack, unlock the door! I know you have a hole in the other side. Jack! Unlock it! Jaaack!! JAAAAAAACK!!! (Tries to joust the door down with his morning wood) JAAAAAAACK!!! JACK!!! (Unholy screeches) (Groaning) (Stephen was screaming, and he gets up he's jabbering) JACK, UNLOCK IT, NOW! (Constipated donkey noises) JACK! JJJJJJJACK!! I'M GONNA CASTRATE YOU WHEN I GET OUT OF HERE! YOUR BALLS ARE MINE! (Screaming and Jabbering. Stephen pulls the door and he gets out.) You're dead. (Jack runs into Stephen's room and he was laughing, and he grabs the camera and he gets out of Stephen's room)
  • Jack: Wow.
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