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This article is a transcript of the Greatest Freakout Ever episode "Stephen And His Bat Car" from special, which aired on August 1, 2014.

  • Jack: Okay, it’s about 10:00 at night and Stephen's trying to drive his Batmobile to McDonald’s again. And... (Chuckle) It’s not legal on the street so I’m gonna ask him what he's doing. Stephen.
  • Stephen: Oh, my god. Dude, seriously, you’re like freakin' harassing me right now, I’m on my phone.
  • Jack: Are you going to... Are you going to McDonald’s again in your Batmobile?
  • Stephen: Oh, my god. Dude, you know where I’m going, I already told you, you're acting up for the camera.
  • Jack: You know... You know it, you know, it’s not…
  • Stephen: No, you're just acting up for the camera.
  • Jack: You know it’s not legal, right, to drive this with all the sirens and stuff.
  • Stephen: Says who?
  • Jack: Uh...
  • Stephen: Says who?
  • Jack: Says the law.
  • Stephen: Oh, I don’t... I honestly don’t care, I'm going to McDonald’s, I don’t have another way to get there, dad won’t let me use this truck, I’m taking this. I don’t care.
  • Jack: Well, it's not. It’s not... It's... Y-you’re not allowed.
  • Stephen: Yeah, I really don’t care.
  • Jack: You're gonna get in trouble.
  • Stephen: Oh, yeah, I'm going to get in trouble.
  • Jack: You’re going to be sent to uncle Philip's ranch again.
  • Stephen: Oh, yeah, yeah, that’s very funny.
  • Jack: Dude, seriously get out of the car. Just drive your other car.
  • Stephen: Yeah.
  • Jack: What are you doing? (Chuckles): Oh, my god! Dude, what the hell? (flames ignite at the bottom of the Batmobile and he takes off) Stephen, come back. Where are you going? Oh, my god. I can’t believe he's going to McDonald’s again. I think he hit something. Oh, my god.
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